The Character of a Judge: An Intimate Interview With Judge Lynn Toler

By Darlene Williams

“There are two kinds of people, those who do the work and those who take the credit. Try to be in the first group; there is less competition there.” — Indira Gandhi

In reality television, it’s not unusual to see stars dressed in designer clothes, dripping in jewelry, sporting elaborate hair, nails and makeup. Often, the polished image is so far removed from their authentic selves that fans wouldn’t recognize them in person. Reality television, in many ways, is anything but real.

That is not the case with Judge Lynn Toler.

When she appeared on my screen for our interview, there was no Hollywood façade. She wore her natural hair neatly to the side, no makeup, and a relaxed outfit. Her beauty radiated effortlessly. After a brief technical hiccup, we both laughed and shouted in unison: “We did it!”

Her warm energy set the tone. What followed felt less like an interview and more like two old girlfriends catching up.

A Natural on the Bench and the Screen

Judge Toler’s commanding presence has made her one of the most memorable faces in reality courtroom television. While many remember that Judge Mablean Ephriam first presided over Divorce Court, Judge Toler brought her own flair and quickly made the role her own.

On screen, and in real life, she is spirited, honest and nurturing. She has the patience to help couples navigate their conflicts, yet she never tolerates disrespect. When she sees authenticity, even in unpolished form, she offers heartfelt guidance that resonates with millions of viewers.

From Medicine to the Law

Surprisingly, law was not Judge Toler’s first career choice. The daughter of a judge, she initially intended to study medicine at Harvard University, following her family’s expectations that she and her sister would become doctors. But she admitted that during her early years at Harvard she partied more than she studied — and nearly flunked out.

When I asked about her time on campus, she smiled. “Harvard was not what some people may think. Educationally, I had the Blackest experience ever.”

Having attended predominantly white private schools growing up, she cherished the opportunity to live among a vibrant community of Black students. “It was different, but it was good,” she reflected.

Wisdom Rooted in Experience

The advice Judge Toler dispenses on Divorce Court and Marriage Boot Camp often carries a sharp mother-wit. When I asked where her insight comes from, she quoted something she once heard: “It’s not what you know, it’s how you feel about it.” She considers this the best advice she’s ever received — and given.

Her counsel to her own sons is more straightforward: “Don’t marry too early.”

Family First

Judge Toler and her husband share a blended family of six sons — two biological and four “bonus sons,” as she affectionately calls them. Transitioning into a stepfamily was never daunting for her. “I knew what my responsibilities were and I just did what I had to do,” she said.

She credits her family’s success to fit rather than perfection. “My family has always been successful because it is the right family for me.”

Overcoming Insecurities

Despite her confident television persona, Judge Toler admitted she did not truly develop self-confidence until recent years. Growing up with a bipolar father left her withdrawn and shy, especially in contrast to her outgoing sister, Kathy. Their relationship was strained for much of their youth.

But when their mother became ill, the sisters reconciled. “My mother helped me realize the importance of acceptance and inclusion of my sister,” Judge Toler said. Today, speaking about Kathy brings her an uncontrollable smile.

No Secrets, No Regrets

When I asked if there was anything she wished she had told her late parents, her answer was immediate. “There is nothing I would want to say to my parents that I didn’t already say when they were alive. I came from a family where everyone knew how the other felt, even if it was unfavorable. There weren’t any secrets, so there aren’t any regrets.”

Advocacy Beyond the Bench

During her years on the bench, Judge Toler witnessed countless women affected by domestic violence. Too often, she said, the legal system merely placed a Band-Aid on deep wounds.

That’s why today she is a dedicated supporter of Bloom 365, an organization that helps survivors of domestic violence. Beyond her financial contributions, she also donates her legal expertise by reviewing the group’s documents at no cost.

Faith and Searching

Though she doesn’t consider herself religious, Judge Toler is a believer in God. She admits she is still searching for a church home. “I am searching for the best fit,” she said. “And I’ll know it when it comes about.”

A Dinner With Giants

Toward the end of our conversation, I asked the classic question: If you could invite anyone to dinner, living or deceased, who would it be?

Her answer: “Winston Churchill, Indira Gandhi, Muhammad and, of course, Jesus.”

I pressed her on Churchill. “He was a brilliant thinker,” she explained. “I believe he was bipolar, which means he was all over the place — but brilliant nonetheless.”

Fun Facts About Judge Lynn Toler

• One word to describe herself: Contradictory

• Favorite activity: Reading

• Favorite food: Double Stuf Oreos

• Favorite color: Yellow

• Celebrity friends: “I don’t have any.”

• Daily workout: Stretching every day, plus regular gym sessions

Kacy Duke, Graceful Gangsta

By Darlene Williams

“Shine bright like a diamond, find light in the beautiful sea, I choose to be happy.” Most of us recognize those words from Rihanna’s hit “Diamonds.” For Kacy Duke, though, they are more than lyrics — they’re a philosophy.

Duke, a world-renowned fitness coach and wellness icon, radiates seasoned energy that is as inspiring as it is authentic. In an era when many trainers rely on ego and flash, Duke offers something rare: joy, trust and wisdom rooted in both movement and spirit.

Her spirit dances, smiles — and, of course, exercises.

Fitness With Purpose

Health and wellness are global concerns, and fitness remains big business. Yet Duke has managed to stand out for decades by blending skill with heart. She has maintained her own dynamic physique while guiding others to do the same.

What makes her story remarkable is not just her celebrity clientele, but her longevity. In her 60s, she looks like she is aging in reverse. Her very presence makes people question their excuses. As she says, “You should exercise every day if you’ve been blessed to be able to move. Exercise doesn’t mean joining a gym. You can walk, dance around the house, or do something. I want to look nice in my clothes, and I want to be healthy.”

Family First

While she’s trained stars like Maxwell, Lenny Kravitz and Bruce Willis, family remains Duke’s anchor. She lights up when talking about her son and daughter-in-law, whom she calls “the coolest.” She only ever wanted one child, she explained, because she loves experiences — not repetition. Fate rewarded her with something even more special: she and her son share the same birthday.

“How phenomenal is it that God saw fit to have us born on the same day?” she said with a smile.

A Powerhouse in Motion

If you looked up “powerhouse” in the dictionary, Duke’s picture could easily illustrate the word. She is an author, entrepreneur, celebrity fitness and life coach, and has sculpted more than 9,000 bodies. Yet, she makes it clear that physical strength is only part of the equation. “How we think plays a huge role in our health,” she said. Affirmations are central to her daily practice. “Affirmations are important because it’s not easy to feel good every day. I always remind myself that God did not bring me this far to drop me. I have to find time to be happy, even in my lean times.”

Mind Over Matter

It may be hard to believe Duke ever has an off day. But when she does, she leans into self-care: a nap, a funny movie, or quiet reflection. She emphasizes the importance of mastering our thoughts. “When trials and tribulations happen, we have to find the value in the lesson,” she said. “When you’re hurt, make it a beacon instead of a burden.” Her philosophy is simple yet profound: movement is a privilege, mindset is medicine, and joy is the ultimate strength.

A Personal Lesson

When Duke invited me to work out with her, I expected a traditional session. Instead, she began with a pre-workout assessment, tailored to my specific needs, then guided me through deceptively simple exercises.

At first, I felt fine. Hours later, though, I discovered muscles I didn’t know existed. I ached in places I never felt before, as if a Mack truck had rolled over me. But I walked away stronger, with better form, personalized techniques and a newfound appreciation for every part of my body.

Kacy Duke’s Tips for a Graceful Life

• Thank every part of your body, especially the parts you struggle to love

• Work from a place of joy

• Encourage others to do the same

• Help others as much as possible

• Don’t let magazines dictate what your body should look like

• Remember: not everyone is meant to be slim, find your own space

• Always work on being a good person

• Defy age; don’t deny it

• Make faith part of your journey

• Always look to God to lift you and put you on the right track

• Trust that God will provide, the more you trust, the more God provides

Claire Sulmers: The Bomb Life

By Darlene Williams

“Spread love, it’s the Brooklyn way.” — Biggie Smalls

Some people are born with the “it” factor. Claire Sulmers is one of them. The Harvard graduate, fluent in French and well-versed in African American Studies, is not just a writer, she’s one of the hottest fashion influencers in the game. Her journey reflects both vision and grit, showing what’s possible when passion collides with perseverance.

From Business Dreams to Fashion Reality

As a young girl, Sulmers aspired to become an international businesswoman. Though she wasn’t sure what that path looked like, she knew success was her destiny. Today, she has built one of the most recognized digital fashion platforms in the world: Fashion Bomb Daily.

Her story proves that even when you don’t have it all figured out, persistence matters. What began as a hobby has evolved into the go-to blog and Instagram page for fashion lovers, celebrities and trendsetters. Actors, athletes, stylists and everyday people turn to her brand for the latest in style.

Finding Her Voice

I had the opportunity to see Sulmers in action after a prayer circle, where she spoke to a room full of women about her journey to the top. She explained how writing unexpectedly led her to fashion.

“I started a blog called Fashion Bomb Daily,” she said with a laugh. “It was supposed to be a hobby, not my job. I just started writing about what I love, which is shopping.”

That passion transformed the way fashion is consumed, both domestically and abroad. With more than one million followers, Fashion Bomb Daily has become a cultural force. Her platform not only highlights diverse styles but also allows followers to interact by rating looks, making fashion both engaging and accessible.

Resilience, Sacrifice and Vision

Sulmers’ rise has been anything but easy. Over the last 13 years, she has become a trusted voice in fashion while cultivating a high-profile celebrity following across music, sports and film. But success came through resilience, blind faith and sacrifice.

She recalls being rejected by major corporations, facing closed doors and enduring lean times in Paris, where she once slept on a twin mattress on top of a bathtub in a friend’s bathroom.

“In life, there’s a level you get to, then you go back to zero,” she said. “Then you catapult, times five.”

Her perseverance paid off. Today, Sulmers is a fashion icon, a trendsetter and a visionary who turned dreams into a global brand.

A Force in Fashion

Fashion Bomb Daily has redefined how fashion is discussed and shared online. Its Instagram presence is undeniable: over one million followers, a constant stream of new looks and the power to influence public opinion in real time. The brand’s cultural reach has made it a favorite of A-list celebrities and a trusted voice among fashion insiders.

Quick Facts About Claire Sulmers

• Favorite celebrity inspiration: Kimora Lee Simmons

• Favorite stylist: J. Bolin

• Favorite color: Periwinkle

• Family ties: Her brother also attended Harvard University

• Father’s profession: Pilot

• Mother’s profession: Educator

Living the Bomb Life

Sulmers’ story is one of persistence, creativity and unshakable belief. From humble beginnings to global recognition, she embodies her brand’s message: fashion is for everyone, and dreams are worth chasing.

She is proof that when passion meets purpose, the result can be explosive, or, in her words, nothing short of bomb.

You Betta Werk! With Vivica A. Fox

By Darlene Williams

When I think of Vivica A. Fox, the first words that come to mind are beautiful, talented and resilient. I first discovered her on the 1990s sitcom Out All Night with the incomparable Patti LaBelle and then, unknown actor Morris Chestnut. At first, I tuned in simply because she shared a name with my childhood friend. But as the show continued, I found myself inspired by a young Black woman shining on screen.

Decades later, Fox has become a household name. For me, interviewing her at a women’s conference in New Jersey that celebrated entrepreneurs of color felt nostalgic and surreal. In person, Fox radiates warmth and confidence, making our interaction feel less like an interview and more like a conversation between old friends.

We discussed everything from navigating midlife changes to which camera angles work best on the red carpet. Her grace, energy and honesty confirm why she is regarded as one of Hollywood’s most enduring stars.

Longevity in the Business

Fox’s career spans more than three decades, with memorable performances in films and television that showcase her versatility. Whether playing kick-butt Vernita Green in Kill Bill, the sassy Shanté Smith in Two Can Play That Game, or starring in the Wrong franchise on Lifetime, she commands attention.

When asked what advice she would give young women entering the entertainment industry, her answer was direct: “You have to do the work! Longevity requires versatility. When I did Kill Bill, I had to learn martial arts. On Dancing with the Stars, I had to learn ballroom dancing. Getting a lot of “likes” does not make you a star. Being beautiful does not make you a star. You have to do the work. In this world of ‘Instafame’ and ‘Instaswipe,’ you must be a triple threat, able to dance, sing and act.”

Role Models and Inspiration

Fox credits her early inspiration to legends. “Pam Grier, especially in the role of Foxy Brown, was my role model. I even named my company, Foxy Brown Productions, after her. Diana Ross was the first woman I saw in concert. Her wigs, makeup, clothes, the way she changed outfits and always looked fabulous, I loved it all. And Michael Jackson gave Black people hope that they could be on TV doing what they loved. He motivated me to move to California. Once I got there, I realized I had to work hard, go to college and take acting classes.”

Her role models have evolved. “Today, it’s my girl Regina King. Regina has earned everything happening for her. She acts, directs, produces, and she’s an amazing mother. She does the work, gracefully. I respect her so much because she never lost herself in fame.”

Fame, Humility and Growth

Fox is candid about her own journey. “Of course, when I was young and had five movies back-to-back, you couldn’t tell me I wasn’t all that and a bag of chips,” she said with a laugh. “But Hollywood is always looking for what’s next. You have to learn how to move into different chapters, going from young, sexy roles, to mature roles, to producing and directing, gracefully.”

What’s Next

For now, Fox continues to thrive as a producer, particularly through her hit Wrong franchise on Lifetime.

“Girl, if it’s ‘Wrong,’ it’s right,” she joked. “We’ve done The Wrong Teacher, The Wrong Child, The Wrong Roommate, The Wrong Cruise. Lifetime is for women, so it’s been a great opportunity for me. I love providing work for upcoming actors while staying in the business I love.” While directing is in her future, she’s in no rush. “It’ll come down the line. For now, I’m riding producing until the wheels fall off.”

The Loyal Lion

When asked to describe herself in one word, Fox answered without hesitation: “Loyal. That loyal lion. Leo Nation, baby!” She hinted that another book may be on the horizon but left details to her longtime publicist BJ Coleman, who smiled and said, “In due time.” Her first book, a motivational memoir, offered insight into overcoming adversity, finding love, building success and doing it all on a budget.

A Lasting Connection

As our interview wrapped, Fox and I exchanged a warm hug, the sistah-girl kind. She was headed into the ballroom to meet her fans, but not before promising we’d talk again. Vivica A. Fox remains exactly what she has always been: a star who works hard, reinvents gracefully and never forgets where she came from.